Can people with Autistic Spectrum Disorder empathise?

At a basic level empathy consists of 2 components; that is, an affective (feeling) and a cognitive (thinking) part. 

There's a common misconception that folks with so called ASD/Autistic Spectrum Disorder cannot empathise. That's not true. It's not that they can't, its that they struggle to reconcile their understanding of thoughts with feelings in other people and also in themselves. 

Life as you know is not black and white...well. Actually I take that back. Yes there is black and white but there's also all sorts of shades in between and not in between. Life is colourful. And people who have problems with social reading tend to also struggle to appreciate and perceive the shades of colour in between more primary/obvious ones. For example: anger, sadness, joy are relatively more easy to understand compared to shame, disgust, disappointment etc.

People with social reading problems also have problems with self-awareness; they almost seem oblivious to what seems obvious to people skilled with social reading.

We can help improve our kids' empathy skills by increasing their self-awareness because this is the basis for personal growth but on a practical level, it helps build up a bank of information (based in experiences) that they can draw on to understand other people's thoughts and feelings. Because if they can understand themselves better, they can understand others better too; and they become more skilled and rounded individuals. 

We need to capitalise on teachable moments; so things that happen organically in the here and now/the present time, as things unfold. We have to help kids develop a language/ a vocabulary for talking about feelings but also link and connect those to thoughts; and the best way to help them to learn how to do that, is if we MODEL this ourselves. 

Tune in to the Huddle Wisdom Podcast: Episode 14 to learn more...