The key to being influential is connection. You need to be able to connect with someone before they will trust you. If they don't trust you, you cannot be influential. Clearly; this is a critical hurdle for any business person, teacher, parent, doctor, human being. But the connection between people is more porous than you might think.
Humans are supposed to connect but we've somehow unlearned or suppressed this; perhaps because in order to connect to another person it means we need to let our guard down. We have to open up so to speak. The implications are great...because we become vulnerable. But if our intention is to be more authentic and genuine in the world, then we have to somehow find a way to get out of our own way and start building bridges with people. Sometimes, it means getting comfortable with the uncomfortable. Now; I am not saying any of this is easy, and I acknowledge the complexity of our lives and relationships but there's no way around this - in order to 'connect' with one another we have to suspend feelings of apprehension towards each other.
With our children; this is a must. Children need to be heard and they need to be seen. Whoever said children should be seen and not heard is an old fart bag. Children need to know that they matter to us, and so we need to open up. This means, less talk and more listening. It also means we must apply unconditional positive regards towards the other and being more reflective and less reactive.
Let me tell you about key ideas which I think is going to help you out in this video:
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Sometimes kids have a hard time talking to you about things when they need the most help. Learn to use emotional intelligence and empathic connection to gain co-operation without the friction.