When Exam Season Hits, Stay Calm and Carry On

Exams are looming, and for many families, it can feel like you're living in a pressure cooker.

We parents often feel like we're sitting the exam too.

We don't get the glory, just the stress headaches and the privilege of trying to stay calm while the young ones are panicking.

So, how can we navigate this season without burning out or blowing up?

Here are some ideas and concepts that might help you out.

First, let's dispel the Myth of Pressure and Performance...

We often believe we must put pressure on our kids to perform at their best. This idea, is a powerful myth. When stress tips into anxiety, something fundamental shifts in the brain. The prefrontal cortex, the part responsible for logic and problem solving, takes a backseat. The amygdala, our brain's alarm system, takes the wheel. All that well meaning pressure can actually hijack a child’s ability to think clearly.

They already feel enough pressure from the outside world; they don’t need it from the one place that should be their safe harbour.

So, if more pressure isn't the answer, what is? The wisdom here lies in quiet, simple things.

• A child's nervous system constantly borrows from yours. The most powerful thing you can do is to regulate yourself. Even five minutes of shared quiet or a silly laugh can help steady them. You are broadcasting the message: "It's okay. We're okay."

• Anxiety isn't the enemy; it’s a signal that says, "This matters to me." When you see your child looking worried, avoid saying, "Don't be stressed!" Instead, help them name the feeling. By naming it, you normalise it and take the sting out of it.

• Our kids need to know their worth isn't tied to a grade. Your presence, making a cup of tea or just quietly sitting nearby while they study, is often more supportive than any academic advice. This is the difference between being their coach and being their corner.

 If you're a student reading this, respect. It's completely normal to feel a bit rattled. That stress is simply your brain’s way of saying, "This matters." The trick is to steady yourself before it tips into panic mode.

• Your brain works better in sprints. Try the Pomodoro Technique: 25 minutes of focused work, then a 5 minute break.

• Your brain literally files and stores what you learn while you sleep. Do not pull all nighters.

• Study with a friend. Teach them a concept; it's a great way to see if you really understand it yourself. Asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

Exams are like storms. They roll in, they’re intense, and then they pass. Take care of your body, steady your mind, and give yourself permission to breathe.

What's your best tip for navigating exam season? Share your thoughts in the comments below!